Do Things Your Own Way

Lately I’ve been thinking about writing on Medium again. Conflicting feelings of both excitement and fear filled me. Do i want to write? Do i have to write?

I think i’m so apprehensive because when i picture writing on medium, i think about detailed, well-researched articles that’ll take me hours to write. I know that these are the type of articles that tend to do the best on medium.

But the thought of doing more research amid my dissertation year at uni is giving me the fear. The unadulterated, unforgiving fear. I can think of nothing worse.

It’s just not what i want to do.

But that’s where the conflict arrives. I want to write but i don’t want to write in that way. I don’t want to publish well thought out articles, structured essays or detailed guides. Yes, they’d be helpful to you. But, no, that’s not what i want to do.

Fuck it.

I’ll do things my own way.

Instead of succumbing to the social pressure of writing genuinely good articles, i’ll write about what i feel like writing about. I’ll give you unbridled opinions. I’ll give you a random assortment of thoughts i had to do. I’ll give you lots but also nothing.

I prefer this way. There’s no boundaries to what i’m doing. That voice inside my head that says “You have to write in this manner to make money” is gone. Fuck him. I prefer this way.

From here on out i’m just going to write about what i wan’t to write about. If it doesn’t work out then who really cares? not me. I’m not relying on this as my sole source of income, it’s just a fun project of mine to see if i enjoy writing.

When i let the words flow like this i really do enjoy writing. Here’s my stream of consciousness.

Thermodynamics. Dinosaurs. Grapes. Thailand. Star Wars.

I’m completely aware that half of this probably doesn’t make any sense. My grammar is all off. My syntax is fucked. Paragraphs aren’t coherently linked.

But maybe there’s some merit to this approach, it got me started after all. Maybe if i use this approach more often i’ll write about what i actually want to write about rather than what i think i should write about. Ultimately, that’ll be more authentic and raw. Ultimately, that’ll be true.

It’ll even possibly get better with time. I might start making more sense.

I might start making any sense.

It think my underlying point here is not to accept things for the way they are. Do things as how you imagine them in your head. Forget the rules and the roadblocks for a second.

Do Things Your Own Way.